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miercuri, noiembrie 12, 2014

101 in 1001: 50 Questions That Will Free Your Mind

1. How old would you be if you didn't know how old you are?
30. I would like to be forever 30. I think it's the best age for a woman - mature enough to know what you want, but not so much so that you can't do something completely childish from time to time.

2. Which is worse, failing or never trying?
Definitely never trying. If you never try, you may miss on things that have the potential to make you happy.

3. If life is so short, why do we do so many things we don't like and like so many things we don’t do?
Fear, I guess. We're so afraid of the unknown that we get stuck in a comfort zone that doesn't really brings us anything useful. I blame the brainwashing we are subject to during childhood and school.

4. When it’s all said and done, will you have said more than you’ve done?
Unfortunately, more said. I'm trying to change things.

5. What is the one thing you'd most like to change about the world?
Eradicate religion. All religions. Religion is the doom of the world, we'd all be better off without it. Less hatred, less violence.

6. If happiness was the national currency, what kind of work would make you rich?
Creating Excel reports. Writing.

7. Are you doing what you believe in, or are you settling for what you are doing?
I love my job, most of the times. It's something I've wanted to do for a long time. So yeah, right now, I'm doing what I believe in. When I'll stop believing in it, I'll stop doing it.

8. If the average human life span was 40 years, how would you live your life differently?
I don't know. Probably stop procrastinating. Do more of the things I love versus the ones I have to.

9. To what degree have you actually controlled the course your life has taken?
Half, maybe. My life would have been a lot different if my mom were still alive; that unfortunate event had a big and not so good effect on my life. I've spent too much time in futureless relationships - consciously. I'm trying to reinvent myself and take more control over my life, though.

10. Are you more worried about doing things right, or doing the right things?
Doing things right. Good enough is never good enough.

11. You're having lunch with three people you respect and admire. They all start criticizing a close friend of yours, not knowing she is your friend.  The criticism is distasteful and unjustified.  What do you do?
Try to change the subject. Talking about someone who is not present is not something I particularly enjoy - though I indulge in some (harmless) gossip from time to time. But if it's someone I'm friends with or respect, I get quite aggressive in defending them.

12. If you could offer a newborn child only one piece of advice, what would it be?
Don't let people chose for you. Make your own decisions. You're the one living your life, not your parents, teachers, friends.

13. Would you break the law to save a loved one?
I don't know. I don't think so. I think the law is there for a reason and must be respected, otherwise we'd live in anarchy. I'd do everything to defend them, though, within the limits of the law.

14. Have you ever seen insanity where you later saw creativity?
Yes. Creativity comes from insanity.

15. What's something you know you do differently than most people?
Family. I'm a detached person. I don't believe in socializing with people I have nothing in common with except for blood ties. I hate conventions.

16. How come the things that make you happy don't make everyone happy?
Everyone if different. That's the greatest thing about the world. Where would the fun be if everyone was build the same way?

17. What one thing have you not done that you really want to do? What's holding you back?
Publish my poetry. I never think it's good enough. Travel through South America. That's mostly about money. Telling him. That's cause I'm chicken.

18. Are you holding onto something you need to let go of?
I've been holding onto something (one) for a very long time. Part of what's holding me back is the fear of actually losing it completely as opposed to the lukewarm connection we now have. Part of it is not wanting to interfere in someone else's life. It's not fair to do that just because I can't move on.

19. If you had to move to a state or country besides the one you currently live in, where would you move and why?
Somewhere warm. I hate the cold, I can live with seeing snow only on TV. Brazil would be my first option. I'm in love with the country, the culture, the language, the people. Portugal would be a close second.

20. Do you push the elevator button more than once? Do you really believe it makes the elevator faster?
No. And no. I'll get there when I get there. If it's something I can control, like walking faster, then I'll definitely do it. But elevators are beyond my control.

21. Would you rather be a worried genius or a joyful simpleton?
A joyful simpleton. Just live. Don't worry about the fate of the world.

22. Why are you, you?
Because I've had experiences that shaped me. Because I met people from whom I've learned things. Because I took chances. Because I made a decision, years ago, that completely changed my life.

23. Have you been the kind of friend you want as a friend?
No, not always. I get too engrossed in my own shit that I sometimes lose touch with people.

24. Which is worse, when a good friend moves away, or losing touch with a good friend who lives right near you?
When you lose touch with a good friend who lives near you. At least when a good friend moves away, you can blame them instead of blaming yourself.

25. What are you most grateful for?
My independence. My ability to not care. My brother.

26. Would you rather lose all of your old memories, or never be able to make new ones?
Lose my old memories. My life can start now, for all I care. It hasn't been so great until now.

27. Is is possible to know the truth without challenging it first?
No. Unless you're just another sheep too lazy to think for yourself.

28. Has your greatest fear ever come true?
My greatest fear is that I will never have children. So far, it's come true...

29. Do you remember that time 5 years ago when you were extremely upset? Does it really matter now?
It matters, every experience we have, every emotion we go through shapes us and turns us into the people we are today. I remember very few specific times when I was upset - my mother's death, the day Ric left. These definitely matter, even after such a long time.

30. What is your happiest childhood memory? What makes it so special?
I have few specific childhood memories. I remember it was, mostly, a happy childhood - we were so free! No tech stuff to hold us back from what really mattered. The happiest is probably snail races with my brother. We were so good at inventing games from scratch.

31. At what time in your recent past have you felt most passionate and alive?
Saturday night. Every Saturday night, for the past 3 months.

32. If not now, then when?
In the spring. I told you I hate winter.

33. If you haven't achieved it yet, what do you have to lose?
Nothing. Maybe some sleep. Oh wait, I am already losing sleep!

34. Have you ever been with someone, said nothing, and walked away feeling like you just had the best conversation ever?
No, not really. The people around me talk, a lot.

35. Why do religions that support love cause so many wars?
No religion actually supports love. Religions are a way of manipulating weak people by hiding behind the concepts of love and acceptance. But if you look closely, no religion actually believes in unconditional love and acceptance.

36. Is it possible to know, without a doubt, what is good and what is evil?
No. There is no good and evil, not if we're talking in absolutes. Each of us has a different set of moral beliefs and what may seem good to someone is evil to someone else. Take the death punishment, for example. Is it good? Is it evil? It depends on how you look at things.

37. If you just won a million dollars, would you quit your job?
No. I would get very bored if I quit work. But I would take a long vacation and travel the world.

38. Would you rather have less work to do, or more work you actually enjoy doing?
More work I actually enjoy doing. As long as it leaves me time for dancing.

39. Do you feel like you've lived this day a hundred times before?
Maybe not a hundred times, but sort of. Though every day is different, some things just repeat.

40. When was the last time you marched into the dark with only the soft glow of an idea you strongly believed in?
When I changed my job at the beginning of the year. 

41. If you knew that everyone you know was going to die tomorrow, who would you visit today?
My grandparents.

42. Would you be willing to reduce your life expectancy by 10 years to become extremely attractive or famous?
It depends. If my life expectancy is 50, then no. If it's around 90 (as women in my family tend to live), then yes. I don't want to be old and gross, so living to be 80 or 90 is really the same thing.

43. What is the difference between being alive and truly living?
We only live once, as far as we know. So my philosophy is to just do whatever the heck you want (as long as it's not killing people or breaking the law or whatever moral paradigms we all live by). I don't believe in living my life quietly and carefully by not "sinning", mostly because I don't believe in a god or an afterlife where I will be punished for having sex and the occasional swearing. Even if you do believe in this stuff, ask yourself, why would god give us a life if not for living it fully? Being alive is just walking the earth for a number of years but not really doing anything meaningful. You just wake up, go to school/work, come home, maybe raise a couple of kids, and then die. Truly living is about enjoying what you do, getting a job that you are passionate about, having hobbies, screaming from the top of your lungs, travelling the world, falling in love, dancing, eating delicious food, getting drunk occasionally, having tons of sex, reading, playing. In a word, fun. Life should be fun. And I know it's not always (truly, I do), but we should make the best of it without worrying what would happen to us in a potential afterlife.

44. When is it time to stop calculating risk and rewards, and just go ahead and do what you know is right?
Every day. Just do it, stop overthinking things. 

45. If we learn from our mistakes, why are we always so afraid to make a mistake?
I blame my caretakers for this (parents, grandparents). We are dog-trained from childhood. Parenting in the old days was all about brainwashing. Raising "good" children who never did anything for fear of getting yelled at and spanked and punished in some way or another. 

46. What would you do differently if you knew nobody would judge you?
Entirely re-live my uni years. Go out more, have fun. Make out with a girl. Write more. 

47. When was the last time you noticed the sound of your own breathing?
Right now. I don't usually stand still long enough to be able to do this.

48. What do you love? Have any of your recent actions openly expressed this love?
Dancing. I dance almost every day now. It's making me so happy!

49. In 5 years from now, will you remember what you did yesterday? What about the day before that? Or the day before that?
Probably not. But I will remember that I was having a great time.

50. Decisions are being made right now. The question is: Are you making them for yourself, or are you letting others make them for you?
These days, I'm making them for myself. I'm done letting others decide my life for me. Two years was enough.

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